SILENCE

There is an old adage which reads ‘SILENCE is golden’. Perhaps the beginning of this adage could be attributed to our forefathers, the cave men who leveraged the power of silence the most when in the jungle. They used silence to stalk a prey and kill for food and they also used silence as a means to eliminate potential danger from animals and foes stalking them. Over thousands of years just as the cave men evolved the meaning of silence evolved and today we Soak In Life Eliminating Noise Clutter & Ego through silence.

While communication has progressed in leaps and bounds, from sign language to the spoken word to the written word and today through wireless technology, our senses are being overworked and fatigued by the sheer magnitude, variety and intensity of the communication tirade. As a result we now have to make a systematic and conscious effort to embrace silence. Putting the mobile phones on silent mode is a visible manifestation of the need for silence to be induced. With noise overpowering us in different ways, being immune to its wiles is not an option. However by being aware that noise is negatively impacting us we find ways and means to address the issue so that we have a better appreciation of our life devoid of complications.

Meditation is perhaps one of the most popular techniques used to leverage the power of silence. The Vippasana method is perhaps one of the most intensive and effective techniques of using the power of silence to connect with the inward self and to rediscover ourself. Whatever the technique, the essence of silence is cut out the noise in our life both physical and metaphorical so that we can listen to our heart, our mind and our conscience. This means we have to eliminate Noise which is sound from the physical world as well as the sounds of negativity, fear and loneliness which is psychological. Then there is clutter that is an outcome of a disorganized, confused and tardy style of lining and thinking. Lack of concentration, being easily distracted and flirting with ideas and thoughts aimlessly, are manifestations of this type of noise. Finally there is the ego, which time and time again rears its ugly head and manifests itself in one-upmanship, the compelling urge to hold center stage and a defiant and stubborn attitude.

Libraries are prime examples of how SILENCE is accorded a god like status. Have you noticed that you can focus better, widen the depth and breadth of your knowledge  and above all stimulate & recharge yourself in the library. If you were to extend the golden rule of silence in everyday life, you would be more observant, less argumentative, soak in a lot more and have people pay attention to you when you share your thoughts and ideas. This is because SILENCE provides both you and those around you an opportunity to Soak In Life Eliminating Noise Clutter & Ego

Action Points

1. Next time you attend a meeting or follow a discussion on TV observe those who speak sparingly. How do they come across in their style of communication? Do they make substantially more contribution to the quality of the discussion/ meeting?
2. Try to sit silently for 5 minutes. Did time weigh heavily on you? Were you able to control your mind from wandering here and there and thinking about a wide variety of issues?
3. Watch a Charlie Chaplin movie to appreciate the power of eloquence emitting from that silent movie.

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LISTEN

Communication is perceived as the life line of the human society. Communications encompasses a wide canvass in terms of styles, languages, variety etc.  Yet uniformly, the backbone of all communication remains one’s ability to LISTEN for it is then that we Let Interest Sustain To Enlighten Now. If we learn to appreciate the value and importance of listening, we would have become better communicators, more socially acceptable, have a wide social and friends circle and above all learn to value and respect all those whom we come in contact with.

Why is it that many of us are poor Listeners? The answer lies partly in our ignorance but mainly in our impatience and biases. Here are a few pointers to understand why we fail to LISTEN and we can then work on improving our listening skills by ironing out our personal limitations that we become aware about.

The misconception that talking holds the key to communication. Nothing is as ill conceived as the notion that the whole business of being an effective communicator lies in being able to talk incessantly. Alas, the notion is taken to ridiculous lengths especially when people meet in social circles, at meetings and definitely when one is in the company of friends and relatives.

Our craving to react rather than respond. The ego often tempts us to rebut, refute, allege, deflect, dissect and digress when we are at the receiving end of a communication. As a result, our mind is focused on immediately reacting to what we perceive to have heard or understood and the victim in the human folly is the power we could have held over the communication if we cared to listen.

Distractions that do not let us focus on listening. Apart from the physical conditions like extreme climatic conditions or poor sound quality or other noises that distract, we can be distracted by our limitations of understanding the contents e.g. Our disinterest in science and math’s. When we are distracted, we are focused on letting the communication directed at us come to an end so that we can escape from the suffocation, pain and monotony that we endured. Obviously listening has no chance to rear its head when we are simply shutting ourselves from the proceedings.

Comprehension of the communication becomes challenging. When the communication is liberally peppered with jargon, technical terms and a lot of philosophy the receiver of the communication is often left perplexed and bemused.

Personal limitations e.g. Prejudices, impatience, quick temper etc. When we participate in a communication process with a prejudiced idea or view point or when we are forced to participate in a process which does not hold our interest or if one is an agitated state of mind, listening would be a near impossible task. Our mind is already preoccupied and absorbing anything would be well nigh impossible.

So how does one try and improve one’s listening skills?

Be aware. A quick look at the points listed above and its relevance to us as an individual would quickly make us aware as to where we need to focus on in order to improve our listening skills. For starters talking less and learning to respond rather than react would dramatically enhance our listening skills.

Be motivated to listen. This is tougher than it seems because every communication situation would be different and finding the right motivation would test our creativity and our will power. To be motivated to listen one needs to find a reason to listen. One good way to be motivated is to visualize yourself as an important participant in the communication process. Another way is, to engage in the communication process with the hope of finding a suitable benefit in the communication e.g. the speaker / writer gives very good examples or shares very good anecdotes.

Prepare to listen. Students in particular or those going for a seminar would greatly benefit if they read up on the topic that will be the focus of the communication. Even a casual participant in the communication process can make an attempt to be prepared by proactively thinking, researching, collating information on the topic of the communication that they would be part of.

Paraphrase, clarify, jot down. Not every bit of the communication is relevant or important. The context, the individual motivation and the perceived benefit of the communication would vary from individual to individual. However every individual can actively listen and gainfully participate in any communication process by summarizing or paraphrasing and clarifying the messages. It works best when one takes the effort of jotting it down and subsequently revising it.

In conclusion it is clear that developing the ability to LISTEN is a key human learning that would be extremely useful to every individual because it allows one to Let Interest Sustain To Enlighten Now.

Action Points:

1. Take a sea shell and press it to your ears and concentrate and try and perceive the sound emitting which mimics the sound of the ocean.
2. If you reorganize the alphabets in the word LISTEN you will get another word that would give you the best hint on how to be a better listener. Can you identify that word?

Power Act - from http://www.actspot.com/ is focused on -

Powering your Spirit to ACT Now.

You are also invited to visit our inspirational and motivational blog

http://www.actspot.wordpress.com